Neighborly Developments

Things have been pretty quiet downstairs since Girl Neighbor moved out and Butt Boy moved in. The dog seems happier because Butt Boy participates in exercising him, he takes very quick showers and never at my time in the AM, so thus the Shower Wars have ended. Boy Neighbor seems generally more content and friendlier. My BF and I were still unsure as to what exactly happened between the couple, who dumped who and why, etc... But now a few weeks have passed and she became a distant memory. Until last weekend. I was watching TV with my BF and saw a familiar car pull on to our street. I jumped up and ran to the window to confirm my suspicions as my bewildered BF was wondering what the crap I was up to. Once confirmed, I ran back into the room and announced that Girl Neighbor was here and brought the same friend who helped her move out for re-enforcement. Boy's car was there and I was DYING of curiosity. Mail pick up, random box of crap left over? WHAT??!! She left a couple minutes later. Luckily, couple hours later I happened to be in the other room when they returned, with the dog. Ok, so visitation rights. I get it. Mystery solved. Or so I thought....
Cut to a couple days later. BF and I returned from a movie only to see her car there yet again. Hmmmm. I just so happened to notice (ahem) that the car stayed there all night. What the hell? Reconciliation? Break-up sex? WHAT? And what about Butt Boy? He just moved in! Will he move back out? Will she move back in? AHHHHHH!!!
But as of yesterday morning, almost all questions have been answered. I was yet again in the other room reading when Boy Neighbor placed a phone call to a friend right under the open window. I was not eavesdropping, mind you. The dude was right under my window speaking with his outside voice. It turns out that they have come to a "friends with benefits" understanding but her friends are very opposed to that seeing as how he is the one who kicked her out(!) and they feel he is just following the "typical male agenda" of using her for what he needs. !!!! I have to say that after hearing this, I feel really bad for The Girl. They had been living with each other for about a 2 1/2 years, and who knows how long they were together before. He kicks her out, then decides he'll do her the "favor" of "letting" her be his f-buddy. Ouch. I can just feel her pain. She thinks this is a door back in to his life and maybe they can work things out. He doesn't want to deal with the hassle of having an actual relationship but she is still a hot lay and has already knows his sexy buttons and he doesn't have to go through the tedium of training a new one just yet. Boy-doucheyness confirmed. I don't think he is purposely using her, just being a dumb, selfish boy. Most people (women) can see this clusterf**k of an emotional disaster coming miles away, like her friends are warning her. But the poor thing can't see beyond her hopes and hurt. Oh, and just to add another layer of crap, I think he might be seeing someone else. There is some chica who is always at the house, but I can't tell if its for him, Butt Boy, or just a friend. Hmmmmm....

Some Serious Dramz Has Gone Down

Well. I have a major update for all y'allz about The Neighbors. Girl Neighbor totally moved out. For good. For evah. Wow. So its just good ole Boy Neighbor and New Dude all alone down there with the Asshole dog (who is really just the sweetest dog, not assholey at all). Is it wrong that I secretly am waiting to hear sexy-time noises to confirm what my BF and I joked about?? Is Butt Boy reason for the split up or the result?
So here is how it went down from my Nosy Neighbor perspective. One morning a couple weeks ago I saw her putting a suitcase in her trunk. Didn't think too much of it. Going on a trip? Visiting her sister? No biggie. But a few days later, my BF, who gets home later than me, mentioned that The Girl's car was back and backed up to the garage. Hmmm, I thought, that's something she's never done. So I casually went to look out the window (read: ran so fast I made those cartoon dust clusters come out of my feet. Because I am mature like that. When I look outside, not only is her car backed up and filled with stuff, but now the Butt Boy's pickup is backed up as well. Oh, BTW, Boy Neighbor is not at home during all this. So after awhile of not going to look out the window every 30 seconds to check on them (ahem), I see the the Butt Boy leave with a mattress. Yikes! He came back and she left a short while after and didn't come back.
Until Saturday morning. Saturday was The Big Move. My BF was working so he missed most of the excitement. Again, Boy Neighbor gone, Girl Neighbor is back with a Random Chick, and Butt Boy is there with a pickup full of freshly loaded furniture and helping them load up the girls' cars. It was a really nice day and I really wanted to go out and read a book or surf the webz outside, but there was no way I wanted to get involved in that Clusterf**k of Awkwardness.
Even though I was hedonistically preying on the drama of the Move Out, it actually kinda stresses me out in a weird way, even though we weren't close. You just don't like to see people the same age as you that have been together about the same amount of time and in a very familiar living situation like you break up. I keep expecting her little white car to be back in the driveway, but every night its the pickup. Very disconcerting. She's gone, Butt Boy is in, and apparently Boy Neighbor got custody of the Not-Assholey Asshole dog.
But let's talk about the real issue here. Does this break up mean that I really didn't win the Shower Wars, or is the break up because I shamed her so badly by winning that she had to leave. Because you know that comes down to everything, its all about me!

They Might Just Be Plain Stupid

So again this morning, right smack at the time I have showered at every day for almost 3 years now, BOOM!, The Chick starts the shower.  Do they just not get it or is this some sadistic form of passive aggressiveness?  I know this all sounds petty, but the morning shower routine really sets the tone of the day. Bad shower = bad mood = bad day. Simple math. And the worst part is that I can't act out and be a jerk like them and take the hottest shower I can stand and leave it running when I am done because my BF deserves a hot shower in the morning too.  I cannot wait to see what shenanigans go on tomorrow.  

PS But I was a jerk today and I did flush the toilet.  Hehe.  I know, still petty.  But they need to learn whose time slot it is in the AM.  And I can play the passive aggressive game like no other!