Getting Wii-Tarded!

I finally got my elusive White Whale today. The Coveted Wii Gaming System! I have been trying to get my hands on this MFer for months now. Granted, I could have gotten up in the middle of the night to go stand in line for hours like a Responsible Person, but I'm too lazy to do that. Naturally, I figured eventually I would just stumble upon a rogue Wii randomly at The Tar-jay or maybe The Sweet Baby BeJesus would leave one on my doorstep like a Prom Night Dumpster Baby. But my Dad, being as awesome as he is, totally hooked me up!




He asked me if I wanted anything for my birthday and at first I said no, but then it just popped in my head. Wii! I said well, if you do want to get me anything, the only thing I really want is a Wii. After explaining what exactly a Wii was, he did a lot of research and tracked on down and got me one! It came today, and in good timing. I was having a helluva day due to a certain client of mine I affectionatly call Dr. Evil (and not in the cool Summers-in-Rangun-Louge-Lessons way), and BOOM. Wii have arrived. **Angels Singing** FYI, you may not be hearing from me in awhile, due to an acute case of Wii-itis (an actual diagnosable medical condition, for realz). No need to call The Authoratayz, just chillin' with my Wii.

Peace out

The Wonk

Wine(o) of the Weak! With Special Guest Star!

This week I decided to mix it up a bit and share with you one of my favorite beers, the Lagunitas Maximus IPA.



IPAs are my favorite when it comes beer, and this one in particular doesn't mess around. It is very rich and has the perfect balance of flavor with the bittersweet edge that is the distinct flavor of IPAs. It comes in a 22oz bottle and packs a 7.5 alcohol level, so its perfect to pop one open and share with a friend.

Cheers!

The Wonk

My New Toy (That Also Almost Got Me Killed and Turned Me Into a Ho-Bag at Work)

I gave myself a little birthday gift yesterday. I bought myself a new BlackBerry Curve!!


I usually just get the freebie phone my cell service offers, so this is the first phone I have actually bought since my first cell! I meant to go get a new I-Am-Turning-Thrirty-But-Still-Can-Look-Hot-Outfit at lunch today, but got distracted by my new phone and spent my whole lunch hour in my car trying to figure it out. I had my windows open for my own protection so I wouldn’t asphyxiate myself like a forgotten dog/baby that gets left in the car while Daddy hits the bar/strip club/slots, but then a freaking bee flew in. BTW, bees hate The Wonk. They hate The Wonk so much that they can, with one swift stinger jab to the skin, actually KILL The Wonk. I was wearing a mid calf-length skirt (ew, skirt, but VIPs are in the office this week) and in my effort to exit the car as swiftly as possible to save my life, I tore the slit in the back of my skirt, to essentially, um, my slit. Now, if I have to get up from my desk, I have to wrap a sweatshirt around my waist, which kinda defeats the purpose of the dress code this week and just makes it look like I probably have a period stain on my skirt. Awesome.

Gone Fishing!

Well, not me, the boy-half of Wonk. He got up at the butt-crack of dawn this morning, grabbed his pole (that's what she said!) and headed off to the Deschutes River with his buddy. Although I am miss him this weekend, it also gives me some time to Do Whatever I Want. I slept in really late and didn't get out of bed until even later. I took a shower much later than that. I got my nails did (more on that later), rented some Chick Flicks that, to be fair, he usually will watch with me but I try to spare him as much as possible. I also straitened up the pad, went to the bank, the grocery, and donated some food, so I am not a totally lazy, selfish biatch. I am not sure when he is coming back tomorrow, but I am looking forward to another morning of sleeping in shamefully late at least!
Now if you'll excuse me, I have to get back to burning CDs, spying on the Newly Batchelorized Neighbor's shennanigans, hanging out with Las Gatas, watching my movies, and eating my favorite dinner of pate, brie, and crackers. Yay me!

The Wonk

Wine(o) of the Weak!

I decided this week because if the impending warm weather, to choose a perfect sunny-day weekend-afternoon wine:



Its from Chateau Ste. Michelle Winery from Washington. This wine is very sweet and light and just perfect for when you want to relax in the sun with a lovely glass of cold wine and a good book or foodie magazine. It runs at $8.99, a very reasonable price. And again, I am a big fan of the weekly sales that grocery stores always have. So grab a glass and a good (or trashy!) book, head outside and enjoy!

Cheers!

The Wonk

Some Serious Dramz Has Gone Down

Well. I have a major update for all y'allz about The Neighbors. Girl Neighbor totally moved out. For good. For evah. Wow. So its just good ole Boy Neighbor and New Dude all alone down there with the Asshole dog (who is really just the sweetest dog, not assholey at all). Is it wrong that I secretly am waiting to hear sexy-time noises to confirm what my BF and I joked about?? Is Butt Boy reason for the split up or the result?
So here is how it went down from my Nosy Neighbor perspective. One morning a couple weeks ago I saw her putting a suitcase in her trunk. Didn't think too much of it. Going on a trip? Visiting her sister? No biggie. But a few days later, my BF, who gets home later than me, mentioned that The Girl's car was back and backed up to the garage. Hmmm, I thought, that's something she's never done. So I casually went to look out the window (read: ran so fast I made those cartoon dust clusters come out of my feet. Because I am mature like that. When I look outside, not only is her car backed up and filled with stuff, but now the Butt Boy's pickup is backed up as well. Oh, BTW, Boy Neighbor is not at home during all this. So after awhile of not going to look out the window every 30 seconds to check on them (ahem), I see the the Butt Boy leave with a mattress. Yikes! He came back and she left a short while after and didn't come back.
Until Saturday morning. Saturday was The Big Move. My BF was working so he missed most of the excitement. Again, Boy Neighbor gone, Girl Neighbor is back with a Random Chick, and Butt Boy is there with a pickup full of freshly loaded furniture and helping them load up the girls' cars. It was a really nice day and I really wanted to go out and read a book or surf the webz outside, but there was no way I wanted to get involved in that Clusterf**k of Awkwardness.
Even though I was hedonistically preying on the drama of the Move Out, it actually kinda stresses me out in a weird way, even though we weren't close. You just don't like to see people the same age as you that have been together about the same amount of time and in a very familiar living situation like you break up. I keep expecting her little white car to be back in the driveway, but every night its the pickup. Very disconcerting. She's gone, Butt Boy is in, and apparently Boy Neighbor got custody of the Not-Assholey Asshole dog.
But let's talk about the real issue here. Does this break up mean that I really didn't win the Shower Wars, or is the break up because I shamed her so badly by winning that she had to leave. Because you know that comes down to everything, its all about me!

Wine(o) of the Weak!

This one is an oldie but a goodie. My parents have bee drinking Columbia Crest wine for years and it is the quintessential NW wine. I choose the Merlot this time, no matter what Paul Giamati thinks about Merlots and the people that drink them. I like Merlots, so deal with it Paul! Its a good steady wine, no tricks, which is true for all their wines. Anyway, almost all of Columbia Crest's wine are $9.99, an of course you can always find them a couple buckaroos cheaper on sale.



Cheers!

The Wonk